Daniel Craig's letter to the Bond people.

"Dear James Bond-chooser people, my name is Daniel and I'm a 38-year old boy from Chester! My mums name is Olivia and my daddy's name is Timothy, but mum always calls him Tim-Tim. Mum can be such a loony sometimes. One time, on my birthday, she pretended that she actually thought it was my sister Lea's birthday. She pretended really well, sometimes I actually think she didn't know it was my birthday. But that would just be too silly of mum.

I read in my daddy's newspaper that you are currently looking for someone to play the character of James Bond in your new film, that's why I'm writing to you. I have always thought James Bond is the coolest! My favourite scene is when Bond kills that guy and the guy dies. It's so good! In fact, one of my dreams is to write a book about James Bond sometime. When all the other kids at my job are working, I sometimes sneak into a closet space and pretend like I'm James Bond in hiding. Sometimes, I stay in there for three hours or so, just hiding! One time, I forgot to eat for a long time and fainted, though. That was not so much fun...

I don't really know how to fire a gun or drive a car, but I learn really fast, I promise! Plus, I have many other skills! I can play guitar hero really well, I can imitate a dolphin really well, and my ears are super flexible. Anyway, if you're interested in letting me play James Bond, just give me a call at my house any time. If mum picks up the phone, just ask for Danny or Dandelion. I'm attaching a picture I made on mums computer, just to show you what a great James Bond I would be!"

x Daniel Wroughton Craig

Seriously, he doesn't even look like James Bond. Terrible choice.