awkwardness part II

Now, this is actually kind of a re-issue. The fact that made me consider bringing this topic up again, is the fact that our bathroom door does not have a lock. Not having locks on doors can, very easily, lead to uncomfortable situations. It can even go beyond that. Uncomfortable situations can magically evolve into pure horror. If you've stuck with this blog for a while, you might remember my post about walking in on your roommate while he is masturbating. Not only that, but he is masturbating to a very disturbing movie. I made a top 5 of awkward movies for your roommate to be watching when you walked in on his fornication-session. On that list, I had 2001 A space oddyssey, Free Willy etc etc. Now, this topic was inadvertently sparked again in my mind, but with a twist. Hence, why don't we do music this time? This top 5 list was compiled two nights ago by me, Max, Alex, Linus and Niclas. I want you guys to imagine walking in on your roommate, while he is thoroughly jerking it to:

-We Are The Champions by Queen
-The Sound of Silence by Simon & Garfunkel
-March of the Empire from Star Wars
-Hey Jude by The Beatles
-Anything by Rage Against the Machine

This list could be made endless, but I don't have all day. As per usual, any suggestions are more than welcome. Ping-Pong in a park awaits. I'm going to London in about two weeks, then Sweden. New York plans for the fall are also in the making. Stay tuned for pictures from Charles the Bear's adventure to Potsdam. Should be good fun.

The Watchmen. True "heroes".

This post will be dedicated to one simple thing. Useless superheroes. I recently saw that movie "The Watchmen", and I must say, I didn't really get it. I think it was supposed to take place during the cold war, but then Nixon showed up, and then all the super-heroes went to the North Pole, just to blow up New York? The plot wasn't the most confusing part, though(Believe it or not). I never understood who was a superhero, who was good, who was evil, and what kind of powers those people actually possessed.

I guess there are five to eight superheroes in the movie(I couldn't keep up). As far as I could tell, this is how their powers where divided:

-One guy is the smartest guy in the world. Okay, I can dig that being a superpower.
-One guy is blue, can re-shape all materials in the world, see the past and future, and teleport himself. Also legit.
-This is where it starts getting strange. One guy wears a cape, and has two different outfits. That's his only power. He wears a different one when it's cold outside. He's a superhero that doesn't want to catch a cold. I guess that makes him the worlds biggest vagina, if nothing else.
-One is a girl who only has like one big scene in the movie, and it's a very graphic sex-scene. Her power is being able to disguise the fact that she's a whore, and still wear latex.
-One guy wears a trench coat, some form of ink-mask, and a hat. He can find a haberdashery anywhere on the planet.
-One guy is a prolific rapist who shoots protesters on sight.
-Last but not least, there was the other girl's mother, who I think retired after being raped by the previous guy.

If you think I'm joking, see the movie.

In conclusion, what did I learn from seeing this movie? In what way has my life changed? Well, I feel two hours older, I no longer think Rogue from X-Men is lame and useless, I'm kind of obsessed with the super-whore, and finally, I can't help but think being a superhero is all just very outfit-based.

The guy in the middle looks like a bug.

The national anthem.

Thom Yorke is an absolute spastic, but that doesn't matter. It's still amazing.

Charles on Facebook

You guys should all become fans of Charles on Facebook

Charles

Berlin Part III

Karaoke in Mauer park on Sundays. I would never have the guts to sing in front of that many people. Kudos to the people that do.
















pics: robbin

Berlin Pictures Part II

pics: robb

Berlin pictures Part I

Here are some pictures from my first month living in Berlin. Good times. Excellent times, in fact.

pics: Me

The most awkward of conversations.

We've all been through awkward conversations, and even though they're obviously of different magnitudes, they're probably equally horrible. Breakups, being fired, and serious conversations in general, tend to make me very uncomfortable. That's when I think about what must have been the most awkward conversation ever. That's why I'm sharing this, to help you guys out. If you think your conversation is awkward, just picture this dialogue play out, about 2009 years ago:

Josef: Hey honey, where have you been?
Mary: Errhm...Nowhere, just doing some grocery shopping.
Josef: Oh, okay. My day sucked, I had to do some bullshit carpentry for this dickhead who refused to be cooperative. Seriously, my day couldn't get any worse.
Mary: Josef, there's something you should know...
Josef: What? Did the fucking donkey run away again? I swear, I'm this close to killing that thing.
Mary: Josef, I'm pregnant.
Josef: You're what now?
Mary: I'm pregnant.
Josef: How is that possible? We haven't even slept together yet.
Mary: I know, but I just had to tell you. I couldn't lie anymore.
Josef: So...who's the father?
Mary: I think it might be...God.
Josef: ......You can't be serious.
Mary: I don't know who else it could be, I haven't slept with anyone, I swear!
Josef: Let me get this straight. My wife is pregnant, and I haven't slept with her. Therefore, I am to believe that God is the father? Did I perceive the situation correctly?
Mary: It's the truth!
Josef: Please do forgive me if I'm feeling a bit fucking sceptical about all this.
Mary: But...Oh, forget it.
Josef..........
Mary.............

About two hours later:

Josef: So, like...How was it?
Mary: What?
Josef: Having sex with God.
Mary: I don't know, you dipshit! I was just pregnant one day.
Josef: Well, one thing is for sure. I'm not living here anymore. Having to explain to people how God made my wife pregnant kind of sounds like a hassle. We should move.
Mary: Sure, I hear Jerusalem is nice! Let's go there. By the way, what should we name the kid?
Josef: Jesus Christ, I don't know! What kind of question is that?
Mary: I think you might be onto something.

The next time you think your conversation is awkward, you can borrow this one from me. Believe me, it's excellent stress-relief.

For my San Fran friends

pic: Throbbin Robbin

I know my Swedish friends in San Francisco are going to love this one:

Phoenix - Lisztomania(Holy Ghost ! Love Paris Remix)

Berlin Fashion Week

Fashion week has hit Berlin, and I might go see a show or two. I actually remember everything about my first fashion show ever. I was 18 and the show was Sonia Rykiel. I remember thinking the music choice(AC/DC - Thunderstruck) was a great choice. The next day I saw Alexander McQueen, it was super extravagant and I thought, "How can he afford this?" From what I've heard afterwards, he couldn't. Oh, and here's the biggest shocker about Berlin fashion week: The shows actually seem to start on time. Suck on that, France.

pics: robbin

Magnificent Magazine

Once again, I have some pictures in Magnificent Magazine. This time, it's the cover and some extracts from my spring snapshot series. Personally, I think the issue looks great and that this magazine has great potential. Feel free to check it out over at their website:

Magnificent Magazine

No, I don't want to visit.

Everyone's always talking about their favorite countries, favorite places, favorite foods, favorite positions, favorite movies, favorite animals etc. You get the picture. Lately, I've been thinking about the first of above mentioned, except not really. I've been thinking, which countries would I least like to visit? Let's make it a top five, should we?

#5 Russia - The country of Russia actually sounds really appealing, but I can't help it. I'm really scared that I would get killed by someone who thinks my race of people just learned how to walk up straight like 15 minutes ago. We didn't, okay? We invented chess, you asshole. Now let me ride your cool railway-thingy.

#4 Thailand - This was a difficult choice. It's not like I think Thailand as a country is lame and has nothing to offer. It's just that I don't feel like going halfway around the world, just to order food in Swedish, spend my days drinking roofied drinks out of something the size of a drain pipe, and then end the night by shooting elephants from my balcony with the rest of the European morons. I would bet every penny I own on the fact that Thai people absolutely despise tourists. I don't blame them, since the only ones they meet behave like retarded 5 year olds.

#3 Purgatory - Not a country, but still. I doesn't sound very appealing.

#2 Australia - Stalingrad anno 1944 mixed with Shawshank prison, A Clockwork Orange, herpes, and eating my own head sounds more appealing.

#1 Australia - I really do not want to go.

Jungle Drum

I can't help but think that this girl is really cute. The fact that she's from Iceland is probably more than half of it, though.

R.I.P

The greatest artist of all time is dead. This officially sucks.

Mickael Jackson - Beat It

Jackson Five - The love you save (1970)

Michael Jackson - Thriller

Michael Jackson - Black Or White

awesome song+broken/lost computer

pics: me

I'm sorry I haven't been updating you guys. First, my computer broke, and then when I finally fixed it, it got stolen instead. ace. I took a lot of pictures and will be posting them when I have the money to actually develop them. Until then, listen to this awesome song. Listen to the whole thing. I'm going to be a total Fever Ray sucker this year:

Fever Ray - Triangle Walks(Rex The Dog Edit)

hungover.

I feel like crap.

New York, New York.

When Frank Sinatra sings "New York, New York", is he trying to emphasize how awesome New York is by repeating the name of the city, or is he just making sure we know he's talking about the city of New York, in the state of New York? I mean, it's always best to avoid confusion. Especially in songs that are that famous.

My friends at work.

I'd like to call this piece: "My friends at work". The little girl on the screen is Lady GaGa. The two girls on the right made money while that video was playing. Ace.

Updated website

So, I updated my website with a new personal album, and also some fashion stuff. The best of album is a set of my favorite pictures from spring 2009, a truly great one. Today, I wanted to do my laundry at a place just down the street from our apartment. I couldn't find it.

Life 1 - 0 Robin.

www.robinjonsson.com

Laserfylla.

This is how you know you've had somewhat of an epic Saturday night: At midnight, you're still playing computer games with your roommates. 11 hours, a couple of long islands and a visit to Berghain later, the police wakes you up, because you're asleep in the middle of the sidewalk. Ace. Here are some more pictures: