Sebastien Tellier(Aeroplane remix)

pic: the artist formerly known as me.

You know how it'd be awesome if Colin Farrell managed to aquire like 94% of all STDs? And speaking of awesome:

Sebastien Tellier - Kilometer(Aeroplane Italo '84 remix)

Let's synchronize the world please.

Okay, I kind of feel the need to know why the world insists on being so fucking stupid? Don't worry, nothing bad happened to me or anything, but I simply thought of too many dumb things today to avoid writing something about the whole mess.

Now, let's see. I'd say the civilized world has existed for at least like 4 000 years. Ever since I can remember, we have thrived to become more "culturally integrated". Meaning we have killed, raped, hammered and spat on each other, like forever. In the midst of all this "integrating", we've come to learn a thing or two from each other. However, there seems to be a couple of inventions/activities that have all slipped through the cracks, and never got the complete and trans-national usage that they deserve.

Hence, here's a short list of things that are stupid, and should be the same in all places. I'd like to call the list: "Let's synchronize the world, please."

-The metric system: Hey, Ben Franklin, you should probably have told your trigger-happy, oreo pizza-addicted offspring that "kilo" means 1000, hence 1 KILO-gram = 1000 grams. "Deci" means ten, and so 10 DECI-meters, would hopefully create the marvel that is 1 full meter. Water boils at 100 degrees and freezes below zero. It doesn't matter how you put it, it simply makes sense. Then again, attacking Vietnam made sense too, and that turned out fabulous. I can see where you'd have trouble.

-GMT: This one is the easiest for me, yet it wouldn't make sense for most people. Let's say that the time is 3 PM in London. Why, in the name of poo-fucking-hell, isn't it 3 PM in the whole world then? If that was the case, you'd simply have to get used to the fact that 3 PM in Australia is night-time. How hard can it be, we're already used to the fact that December is summer there. Also, if we simply skipped the time-zones, then your boss wouldn't have to deal with your ridiculous placebo-faux-jetlag, that you supposedly acquired while spending four days in Cyprus, one hour ahead of Swindon, or wherever you happened to spawn.

The position of the @ symbol on your keyboard: As we speak, I'm trying to send an email from someone else's computer. Spending 30 minutes writing the email was super fun. Not being able to type the receivers full email-address, is moderate/no fun at all.

Having the original names for fictional characters: I don't see why Donald is "Kalle" in Sweden, and "Arne" in Denmark. Isn't that just linguistically crippling the youth of your country? Granted, Danish people can't properly pronounce 86 % of all words, but maybe "Donald" could be managed? If not, I can't wait for the televised broadcast where the Danish royal family get to meet American business mogul "Arne Trump". Not to forget his children, "Lego" and "Pölse" Trump.

-Driving on the right/left side of the road: Jesus fucking christ, just pick one?

-The fork: Is it just me, or is the fork a fucking spectacular invention? All honor given to the chop-sticks, but now that the concept of "world cuisine" exists, is it not possible to adapt, just a little bit? Sorry, but I imagine that eating a T-bone steak with chopsticks would be like trying to strangle a Grizzly bear with one dildo in each hand. Good luck with that, city of Osaka. (Lovin' your sushi, by the way!)

Those were just a couple of things, I'm sure there are more. If you have any suggestions, feel free.

// R

updated website

I've updated my website with a recent little picture series. You'll find it in the "fashion" category:

www.robinjonsson.com

Song-posting state of mind.

pic: robmonster

I'm in the mood for posting a song, I have no idea if it's old or new. Tomorrow, I'm going to London and on Sunday, I'll be in Dubai. I'll be sure to take pictures and keep you guys posted while I'm there. Anyways, here's the song:

Pnau feat Ladyhawke - Embrace(Fred Falke & Miami Horror Remix)

Pages in Amelia's Magazine

The summer after I had graduated from photo-school, was the first time I ventured to create some kind of fashion story. Looking back at it, I probably didn't know what I was doing. But at the time, I thought it looked awesome and sent it out to as many people as humanly possible. From those 400 000 sent emails, I remember getting one reply. It was from Amelia Gregory, the editor-in-chief, and creator of one of my favourite fashion/photography/music magazines of all time: Amelia's magazine (not to be confused with old lady-magazine "Amelia" in Sweden)

That first story never made it into any issues, but I've kept in touch with Amelia since then, updating her on my progress etc. Seriously, this magazine is fucking incredible. With every issue, you get a limited edition gadget, and for their first ever issue, they had Pete Doherty write a song, specifically for that issue. Take a magazine like Lodown, for instance. They've recommended this magazine in the past. When an awesome magazine recommends another magazine, you should probably buy it.

And so, for the 10th and final issue of Amelia's magazine, Amelia asked me to shoot some stuff. I didn't exactly hesitate. So anyways, I've got pages 89-90-91, and 101,102,103,104 and 105. I'm listing their website below, so you'll know where you can find it. Which I think you should.

Amelia's Magazine

COMMON PEOPLE. PÅ VINYL HELST.

Here are some pictures from the past couple of weeks in Sweden. It's been fucking freezing, but a solid amount of non-controlled fun. I'm currently sitting in a dingy cafe in Berlin, and in about one week, I'm going to be in Dubai. Things are shaping up. Also, I have pages in the last issue of Amelia's magazine , but I haven't received my issue yet, so I can't tell you exactly which pages and where to get the magazine. I'll write something about that in a couple of days. Until then, here are the Sweden pictures:

My favourite pictures from 2008.

Look, I'm all for christmas, but let's face it, it tends to get a bit fucking boring around 8 PM. Hence, I'm going to post my favourite pictures from this year. 2008 was basically the year I started carrying disposable cameras wherever I went, and it turned out to be a fucking great idea. Not only did I record a lot of fun things, but I got a lot of magazine attention from it as well, certainly more than before.

Naturally, there's a lot of film and its hard picking X favourites. I feel like I've been doing too much shit to post less than 30(plus the two intro ones above). Hence, I'm sorry but this is going to be the longest post ever. I fully understand if you already feel like tuning out. Now, these probably aren't the "best" pictures, they're simply my favourites. Alright, enough with the intro. These are my favourite pictures from 2008:

Me and Linus went to Coachella music festival outside L.A. Our tent was, without a doubt, the smallest thing on that campsite. Including bugs and shit.

These are my two London-roomies, Nat and Ghaz. I'm pretty sure Ghaz is a lesbian. Or a vegetarian. Semantics.

This picture pretty much defines the United States of America to me. Fat people with cowboy-hats. Just imagine the water being cheese, and it's dead on.

This might have been one of the cutest NY-girls I've seen all year. She was like a mix of black, white, Kleopatra, God, ice-cream, sports, video-games, and a wet dream.

This one is essential. Meredith looks awesome, and she lives on a boat. Her room is under water. My room officially sucks.

This is a snapshot from my first Nylon shoot. The crew seemed a bit uncomfortable at first with the skinny 21-year old photographer, but they got used to it. I hope.

In San Francisco, Sara had just flooded the toilet and gotten pee on her hands. She wanted to share the wealth with Fanny. Fanny thought that was pretty much the worst idea ever.

Me, Linus and Jakob shared one bed at a shady motel in L.A. The toilet worked to a moderate extent. Also, there was only one thing on TV; porn. So we just took turns leaving the room.

We met some random Swedish girls in New York. I had a lot in common with them, actually. The main thing being that none of us looked Swedish.

This is around 5 am on my birthday, Lin rocking out in our living room.

This was when I shot Jandra this summer in London. She was great. She is what would happen if the Queen of Narnia and Arwen from Lord of the Rings ever got down, and decided to create some sort of super-elf. Which would totally be my favourite animal, by the way.

On one of our many road-trips, we decided to stop at Madonna Inn, where some sort of cult had a dance contest. Linus wanted to try the steps, and this extremely horny woman didn't mind showing them to him. Cruel intentions are the best.

This is right before Barack got elected president. Now, I lived between Bed-stuy and Clinton Hill, where the election of a black president was very much appreciated. If you live in San Francisco, it would be the equivalent of Elton John getting married. To George Michael.

Good old Holltron. The cupcake-slut version, a personal favourite.

We drank whiskey, slept for 3 hours and then had a shoot in Soho. Hence, this is pretty much what we were doing when we should have been doing our job. This was also the shoot where I thoroughly explained to everyone in my team that my lighting-director Michael, actually didn't respond to any names, except "Highlander".

This is Linus and Anna in Florida, a couple of days before we drove through the Port of Miami, while listening to Rick Ross. I've never seen Jakob that happy. He peaked right there.

Masha just looks awesome in this one, I couldn't help myself. Plus, she's wearing the shirt that me and Linus made.

This is not what it looks like. I kinda wish it was. Actually, I bet he's the one who kinda wishes it was.

While completing a road-trip to Key West, there are a number of things you should stay away from, while being intoxicated. All of those things are magic markers.

We went and hung out at Max's house in Santa Barbara. This is the view from his porch.

This picture was taken right before one of the weirdest week-ends of my life started. Unfortunately, I was out of film after this. Say want you want about Coachella, but it's never dull. Also, I've never seen anyone have a less platonic relationship with a hot-dog. Thank you, Sanna.

Snapshot from my cousin's awesome wedding. I can't decide what I loved most. The food and wine, or the fact that I was hanging out with people who love "Common People" as much as I do.

If you don't want someone to tattoo the word "kill" on your body, don't be a dog in Berlin.

For those of you who didn't know, this is Charles the bear. If you collaborate with him and still fail to get lucky with the ladies, you're pretty much a lost cause, and should buy World of Warcraft as soon as possible.

2008 was the year I discovered that this is the only way to eat ice-cream.

Have you ever had one of those days when you don't know what to do? Me and Linus had one of those days in London. So we bought a bear costume from China. Who needs a TV.

Speed-drinking yoghurt is a good amount of semi-controlled fun.

The man with an electric wheel-chair and a huge inflatable cock. In no way would that make a worse cartoon than Sponge-Bob Squarepants.

This was when we rowed out and jumped off cliffs in Sweden this summer.

This was during a punk concert on a boat in New York. It was great fun. It actually felt like a genuine concert, as opposed to seeing a smelly french guy with wayfarers, playing a 20 minute marathon-version of D.A.N.C.E. Also, the guy next to me smelled like a nuclear disaster. But at least he couldn't sing.

Anyways, I guess that's it. I still have two more rolls of film to develop from 2008, but I guess I'll have to include them in the 2009 issue. After having looked through all the rolls from Paris, London, Berlin, Sweden, New York, Florida, California etc, I've condluded that this was a truly awesome year. I'd even venture to say it might have been the best one so far. With an emphasis on "so far".

If you want to see my complete snapshot-series from 2008, just go to my website:

www.robinjonsson.com