old polaroids part 2

Me and Anna, New York 2007


Erik, Me, Linus, Ines and Mylie, Gothenburg 2007


Joel, New York 2007


Evy, Paris 2007


Joel, New York 2007


Homeless man and Me, New York 2007


Me, New York 2007


Holly, New York 2007


Me and Miel, Paris 2006


Erik, Paris 2006

Use a condom.

Let me tell you about how messed up my laptop is: The CD-drive doesn’t work, the computer needs to be plugged into the wall at all times, I have to move the mouse constantly if I want the internet to work, and the following keys don’t work: A, Z, CAPS LOCK and Tab. Oh, and I saved the best one for last. This stupid computer won’t let me empty my own trashcan, because I do not have ”sufficient priviligies to perform that action”. What the fuck does that mean? I bought the computer. If I don’t have sufficient priviligies, then who does? Is there a person out there who’s unaware of the fact that now only he has the sufficient priviligies to empty the trashcan on my computer? Do I need to set off on some sort of quest to find this person? I’m telling you, it’s like the Sword in the fucking Stone. King Arthur, if you’re reading this, I need your help pulling the sword out of my trashcan, please.

I honestly don’t get it. Did my computer just wake up one day and decided, ”nu-uh, you’ve lost all priviligies to this body”? I've never encountered such defiance in my own home. It's quite shocking. And this raises all kind of weird questions for me. Was I a bad owner? Did I not treat it right? I always made sure there was a fresh power supply nearby, I always gave it the best new software, and I bought a case to keep it warm. Sure, I might have smacked it around a bit when it didn’t do what I told it to, but I never took it too far. All I ever asked in return for taking care of it, was that I got to play around with it a little bit after a hard day at work. Is that so bad? Many people will probably say yes, but I bet all those people have young, hot office-computers that they can play with, thus relieving them of everyday stress.

Well, in any case, I’ve had enough. If anyone wants to take my belligerent, ungrateful, dumbass computer off my hands, feel free. Because I’m fucking out .

old polaroids part 1

Ever since I can remember, I've been taking Polaroids. Now, most of you will think that means I've always had a Polaroid-camera. That is not the case. I'm just bad at remembering things that happened before 2006. Especially since my life before high-school was pretty much the most boring, shitty, inbred existence ever. Now, I have hundreds of old Polaroids lying around, and I really want to post them, but I haven't gotten around to scanning them all. If you've read this blog for a while, you'll probably recognize most of these, but I thought all the new readers might enjoy them. I hate the fact that I need to point this out, but yes, these are actual polaroids. They are not an online program that adds a white border to your photographs, so you don't have to pay the extra money that polaroids cost.

Me, Erik and Linus in our apartment, Paris 2006


Anna and Alli, New York 2007


Linus, Stockholm 2007(?)


One of my first shoots, Paris 2006


Darjeeling, India 2007


Peter, Linus and Andreas with stolen sign, Gothenburg 2007(?)


Anna, New York 2007


Busy P and SoMe, Paris 2006


Holly. New York, 2007


Me eating pizza, New York 2007


This was right before Maja left for Brazil, and we were talking about how she is going to be a great photographer. She proved this by cropping off my head in this photograph.

Special, yet ordinary people.

Remember when tv used to be fun? You know, splendid shows like 90210, Melrose Place, Sunset Beach, etc etc. They're brilliant. To me, they could almost be compared to Kafka, in the sense that nothing ever really happens, but every chapter is still every bit as intriguing and well written as the last. Anyway, today I finally figured out what those epic shows are actually about. They're not about nothing, in fact, that couldn't be further from the truth. If you think about it the next time you watch one of them, you'll realize it, too.

I know the shows are meant to portray ordinary people, who always manage to get themselves into tricky, yet exciting situations. That's what you're supposed to think. Maybe that's what the script writers think, too. But I know the truth. These shows are about a very specific, ancient type of people, that have only appeared a select few times throughout history. I'm talking about "people who don't walk straight into a room, but for some reason, stop for a couple of minutes just around the corner, to listen if their name is being mentioned in the other room, so that they can hear things that they would be better off not knowing". Those people.

I mean, who does that? Who stops for a while outside every room, to listen if their name is being mentioned. Since this happens all the time in every episode, it's impossible that it just happens by chance. I mean, the characters have to play the odds somehow. Don't get me wrong, I love all shows mentioned above, but they're supposed to be about normal people. And by "normal", I don't mean boring, I mean "not insane". How you'd even pitch a concept like this to a producer is beyond me.

"New shows. Brainstorming-time, come on."
"Sir, I have an idea that I think could be great."
"What is it?"
"Well, you know how, when you enter a room, you kind of just enter? Or maybe even knock?"
"Yes."
"Well, what if you didn't?"
"Didn't what?"
"Didn't just enter rooms. You stopped outside every single room to hear if anyone is saying bad things about you."
"Why would I do that? That's creepy.
"That's what makes the show unique, sir!"
"Wow, that sounds pretty dumb. Continue."

We all know where they went from there.

Please let us pay you to shoot something you don't care about.

I don't have anything against the concept of marriage. You know, you get everything down on paper, you get to announce your love to the world, and you get to throw a huge party where everyone pretend like things last forever. It's pretty cute, actually. What I fail to understand, is why people's cerebral capabilities seem to greatly devolve, whenever their wedding is coming up. Do you know how much money people spend on weddings? It makes me genuinely angry when I hear people talk about it. Especially since you always hear people talk about it, as if it's a good thing to spend as much as possible. It might just be me, but I'd like to think that people get married because they are in love, not because they share the same monetary retardation. Even cutting costs in half, you could still throw a magnificent party, you just have ditch some of the abundant crap. More specifically, I'm talking about the concept of "Wedding photographers", aka the biggest bullshitters in any hemisphere.

These people charge like 3 000 dollars to maneuver a camera that has an automatic setting which works just fine with anyone operating it. Why can't you put 3 000 dollars in a savings account, give it to charity, or buy a midget entourage instead? All of those things make more sense than paying some moron that much money to shoot something he doesn't give a shit about. I'd even venture to say you'd get better photos if your little niece was running around with disposable cameras. At least that'd be original.

But then there are really great wedding photographers that know how to take really artsy shots, thus giving everything that little extra edge, and making your wedding memories extra special. That's not the case, though. Those photographers are simply at a party where they don't know anyone, and they're fucking bored. That's why they're taking stupid photos of hands linked together, flower arrangements, and mirror reflections of rice flying through the air. In fact, if you know anyone who's having a wedding, and doesn't know a single person who can maneuver a digital camera, give me a call and I'll come do it for free. I will eat roadkill before spending that much money on someone who probably just couldn't hack it within the category of photography where he/she initially wanted to place himself.

Other things that have been going through my mind today:

-What are "Oriental flavored noodles" supposed to taste like? The orient?
-It sucks being sick on your last couple of days in New York.
-People who think someone like Adriana Lima is the most beautiful girl in the world. You people are easier to please than puppy dogs.
-I really want to see The Fantastic Mr Fox.

fan vad gemängligt

Here are some pictures from the past week or so. It includes Boys Noize, Basement Jaxx, fashion shoots and general randomness. Also, I broke my camera. You won't believe it when I tell you how, it's ridiculous. So, we were waiting for the JMZ at Lorimer Street, a station that is above ground. And by above ground, we're talking 30 feet, at least. Anyway, I was drunk and chewing a piece of gum. When I felt like I was done with the gum, I wanted to spit it out and kick it in the air. I did manage to kick the gum in the air, but as I kicked it, my Yashica T4 slipped out of my pocket, and dropped 30 feet onto the pavement. Boys will be boys, huh?

pics: Rob the cop

pasta my balls

Once when I lived in Paris, I came home intoxicated and decided to make myself some food. Pasta was the obvious choice, and I must say, I mastered the task beautifully. Until it was time to bring the pot over to the table. I tripped on, what I can only assume was nothing, and subsequently dropped all the pasta on the floor. Now, when faced with a conundrum like the one previously mentioned, there are two main options. The first option is to scoop everything off the floor, ignore the starving children, and throw the food away. I barely even hesitated, before going with option number two. I ate the pasta off the floor. With my hands. This got me thinking, why is it a common connotation that one should wash pasta with cold water after having boiled it with hot water? I've heard that makes the pasta more firm. Does that mean pasta works kind of like testicles, in the sense that it expands in a hot environment, and then shrinks in a cold one, thus making it more firm? Before delving further into this topic, I just want to acknowledge the fact that I just ruined pasta for all of you, by comparing it to a man's scrotum. Sorry, my inquisitive self just gets a bit carried away sometimes.

Actually, I don't think I'm going to investigate the matter further. I just felt like ruining pasta for everyone. Please keep spaghetti in mind while you're gobbling away on those spherical divinities. And vice versa, of course.

I have a shoot on sunday. wish me luck.

More pictures

Here are some more pictures from when Charles the Bear celebrated Halloween in New York. Also, I found the best acronym ever while reading about space related things on Wikipedia yesterday: AUSARFCCEUOSPP, also known as the Agreement between the United States of America and the Russian Federation Concerning Cooperation in the Exploration and Use of Outer Space for Peaceful Purposes. Best name ever.

pics: jaeg
like charles a bit

My tips for christmas present of the year.

I don't know if you guys have ever encountered this, but in Sweden, we have something called "Christmas present of the year". I guess it pretty much is what it sounds like. It's a collective decision that a certain object will be the best thing to give people for Christmas. Such a concept makes total sense to me. I mean, it's not like everyone likes different things. It's not like people have different needs and interests. So, I found a list of what "Christmas present of the year" has been, ever since 1988. Here are a few that I think are...questionable.

1988 - A Bread Machine: I got you this product to emphasize the fact that you won't ever need this product. Merry Christmas.
1990 - A Wok: It's a frying pan with slightly more elevated sides. Neat.
1993 - Perfume: Christmas present of the year being a slight insult to someone.
1999- The Bible: Jesus Christ. Literally.
2003 - A Warm Hat: The climax of Sweden's most popular holiday should always be a piece of cloth that goes on someone's head. Always. It also has a wide variety of users, including...all people who have heads.
2005 - A set of poker cards and chips: To show you just how unique you are, and how much I appreciate your genuine self, I've decided to give you the lamest thing ever. Call me when you're in debt to someone.
2008 - An experience: This is the part where everyone started handing out oral sex. To their family members.

In the spirit of this great holiday, I've decided to make my own list of five things that I think should be considered for "Christmas present of the year 2009":

-An electronic appliance that turns itself on automatically when you push the ON-button.
-A Trinidad & Tobago flag.
-A T-shirt that says: "I went to Greece. It was pretty cool. I enjoyed it."
-A Warm hat. Or maybe an experience.
-Mustard.

Me on Ilovephoto.

Ilovephoto put one of my photos up on their backgrounds page. Basically, it means you can download it in high-res for your desktop, background or whatever. I took this picture from the stage at Melt! Festival this year, when Alex brother was kind enough to give us tickets. I think this might be when Boyz Noize played Blue Monday and everyone went completely bonkers. Unfortunately, I don't have a direct link to my image, but if you go on their site and scroll down a bit, you'll find it. There's lots of other great pictures to download as well.

Ilovephoto high res backgrounds

HALLOWEEN WITH HUSTLIN HONEYS

Ghaz: A cat/a bunny/a squirrel or something.
Me: Charles as an intern for Steve Zissou
Jonna: Dirty person from Sweden, currently living in New York

MY BEST BUDDIES HUSTLIN HONEYS

some more pictures

I just got back from Washington DC, and even though my computer is pretty much completely broken by now, I managed to upload some new pictures. Also, the Halloween party at our loft on Saturday should be fun. If you want to stop by, it's on 910 Bedford avenue in Brooklyn. Take the G to Bedford-Nostrand, exit onto Bedford and walk along traffic until you get to 910. If I can get my computer working, there's a good chance you'll get to see Charles the Bear playing some lovely tunes around 9-10 pm. There will be a cover of 3-4 dollars to cover expenses for the two bands, but drinks will be really cheap. Of course, you're allowed to bring your own alchohol if you want to. Anyway, here are some pictures:

pics: robb

soooo gooooooood

Chromeo's new song "Night by Night" is dangerously addictive.
Get it here